Monday, May 01, 2006

a month???

So, I saw my doctor today. This is how the visit went.

After waiting in her office for a half an hour, the door opens.

DOC: Hey there, give me just a second, gotta log on to this my gosh, has it already been a week since you were here?
ME: Yes.
DOC: Are you sure? No...I thought you were here on Friday???
ME: No, it's,'s been a week. (I think I'd know how long I've been walking around with a half paralyzed face.)
DOC: So, how ya doing?
(I am about to open my mouth and say "Much better! Look! LOOK! My eyebrow twitched this morning! Can you believe it? And I can smile a little! See! SEE", when she says...)
DOC: Hmmm...not so great huh? Eye's still not closing?
ME: (Not so great? You should see the Serial Killer Palsy picture I posted on my blog!) eye? No, no, it's closing. It's been closing all along, see?(I close both eyes.)
DOC: No, it's not.
ME: Yes it is! See, look! I can close it. (I close my eyes as hard as I can.) Look, it's closed! (I open my eyes.) See, I told ya...
DOC: (Shaking her head with pity) Nope. It's not. Sorry. So, let's see what they say for your treatment...
(Is she logging on to the Internet???)

So, 30 minutes of waiting, and 5 minutes of examination later, my doctor sends me off, saying "good luck, hope it gets better soon!" with instructions for care that were most likely culled from a Google search.

According to, my doctor...the symptoms are going to last for at least another month, possibly even two!

"But don't worry," my doctor said. "They should go away completely."

Excuse me? Should? Did you say should?



east side girl said...

What an a-hole! I had a doc do that to me once, too! What's up w/ doctors and google?

Doom/Blondie said...

well look on the bright side.

you appreciate appearance more (this is such a pure example of irony)and you'll get one hell of an anecdote -

oh yeah - and you have all the effects of botox for free.

admittedly on one half of your face only.